Build This Muscle: Go Back to the Container

A practice for work, life, and everything in between.

I had a conversation recently with some friends who were struggling. They were experiencing mounting frustrations with a client about unspoken expectations that had quietly crept in. After digging a little, my friend acknowledged not only had they not revisited the original agreement, they had not built in anything about conflict.

And that friends, is how things go sideways very quickly.

In any group, team or coupling - conflict always arises. Whether it's visible or within someone's ears, conflict happens.

I'm reminded of a core principle I learned from Peter Block—a philosophy I return to over and over again: Always go back to the original contract. Or, as I often say now: Go back to the container.

The Container Is More Than a Contract

It’s the holding space we co-create. It defines not only what we’re doing, but how we want to be in the doing. Sometimes the container looks like a formal charter and other times it’s a shared verbal agreement. Whatever form it takes -- it sets intentions and gives clarity on what matters.

Over time— we forget. We adapt in silence. We let things slide. We accommodate without naming and then, before we know it, we’re 100 miles off course. Eeek!

This Isn't Just Theory

I don’t just make this stuff up. These blogs are born from the real dynamics of business and life—because in my world, they are one and the same. The lessons I share come from actual conversations with clients, collaborators, and teams navigating complexity, growth, and change in real time.

What happens at the board table echoes at the dinner table. What gets ignored in a team charter shows up in family dynamics too. This is human work. All of it.

🔁 A Practice: Return and Re-center

Schedule regular check-ins—especially when you notice:

• Misalignment

• Friction

• Unspoken expectations

• Scope creep

• Fatigue or resentment

Use the moment to say: “Let’s revisit what we agreed to. Does it still hold? Is there something we need to re-clarify, re-contract, or re-imagine?”

The Invitation

Whether you’re working with clients, colleagues, teams—or even family—Build the muscle of returning to the container. Because when you honor the original agreement, you give your relationships room to breathe, evolve, and rebuild. And that is the foundation of sustainable, human-centered work.

If you want to learn a rock-solid container-building process, send us note and we'll get you squared away!

Love Big,